just call me nanny

just got back from nannying noon-five. wooh! Quite a job! Anyone who believes being a nanny is easy should try it sometime.
So, realizing that this is probably going to be the bulk of my summer weekdays I thought it would be fun to keep a side story going of my day to day nanny "journaling."
hopefully some of my experiences will be entertaining :)

june 13th, 53 degrees and raining

Okay I officially fed up with Washington and this ridiculous June we are having. I have seen the sun maybe 3 times since I have been home? and the grey looming clouds are all in all depressing. I think I have written in previous entries about having a weather dependent personality. That said, countless days of rain are taking a toll on my emotions.
On a happier note, I got a NANNY JOB!!!!! and have a summer of watching two adorable kids! Abigail is 9 going on 10 at the end of july and Wyatt is 7 and going into 2nd grade next year. They are so cute and I'm so excited to get closer to both this summer.
So nanning is about 4 days a week (~5 hours at a time) and I'm also working at St. Mary's every Sunday and Thursday.
Putting aside the bad weather, I have lots to keep me busy until the end of August!
Off to see my precious two-some! =)

limits

you never know your limits until they're broken.
after that happens, you learn to pick up the pieces, see where you went wrong, and understand that nothing will ever feel quite the same.
after you accept those terms, you spend the rest of your life trying to find peace with your past; those limits that were tested and pushed.
i admire the man who said something along the lines of.. it is not the obstacles that you encounter in life that are the hard part, it's the living your life part that proves to be the toughest challenge.

i have just begun the search, and am thoroughly terrified.

quiet

I should be sleeping but of course the computer seems so much more appealing to me at the moment. Sometimes I find peace when everyone else is asleep and the house is completely quite. No one is talking, yelling, or on the phone. TV's are off, kitchen is dark, hall lamps are dimmed. The only noise that keeps me comforted is the clock which rings every quarter hour; something that no matter the hour of the day it keeps things on track, maintaining order of our ever changing time.
Solitude is a funny word when looked at carefully.
>>the state of being or living alone; seclusion.
Then I wonder, seclusion from what? I would have to argue that this definition is only as deep as the sentence fragments it is made of. I do not believe in total seclusion, how can there be such thing?
You are never completely void of your thoughts..
feelings that cannot be logically defined but only emotionally understood.

so good to see familiar faces!

Now with my first year under my belt it is so nice to take advantage of the fact that I know so many more people.
Just last night Jackie and I drove up to Seattle, had a nice dinner on the waterfront and went to Jessen's grad open house. Four or five delta's were there.. it was so good to be home but at the same time feel like those who you spent all year getting to know are not too far away. Shaina is up from Bend, OR visiting her boyfriend and so they were there, Aimee who lives in Seattle and actually went to high school with Ali was there, and Danielle who is another sorority sister was there too!
Friday hil and I went to have lunch with Shaina and then she ended up spending the whole day with me. We picked up cakes for Hil's Dad's birthday, she got to shower in a safe (non-awkward) house and we went out on the boat :) it was so good to see her!
Her and Liza are definitely coming up to visit this summer because I don't think I can wait until next semester when they come for a weekend. They are both transferring to U of O : / ...so visits are so special to me!
I got a package in the mail yesterday and Liza sent me The Traveler's Wife, a novel aka according to both the most AMAZING LOVE STORY OF ALL TIME. SO will THAT rave review it's going to have to be one of my summer reads. yah!
all for now---

oh ps! finally figured out how to upload a pic on to this blog thing... it only took me a year to figure out! AND I have officially started scrap booking... 4 pages in! ♥

and pss: HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY JESSUPP. one more year and you can (legally) hit the bars! ;)

home & boats

I'm home and it feels wonderful. It has been almost a week and I am slowly starting to remember what I missed the most. Sometimes you don't really realize what you have until you well, don't have it anymore. For me, I realized I had such a great support system at home when I was removed from it. Put in a dorm with roommates, no cable, a hallway bathroom, and ant invasion problems. Hmmm. The wonders of freshman living.
Yesterday was my first ride on the boat this summer! It was amazing! It really was. It wasn't hot really but the sun was shining and everything was clear and blue. There's something about boating on the lake that is so soothing. I can't really pin point the feeling but everything just gets a little quieter. The trees looked almost luminescent as their big branches stretched over the waters edge, the green leaves flirting with the wind and making ripples in the water.
The water was cool and refreshing as I bent over the side up-side down to feel the wake. The wind was cold but I didn't mind. I hugged my knees and kept my eyes pealed for anything new I could absorb.
We cruised along the waterfront homes, taking in all of the idiosyncrasies of the individual houses.
The flags, paint colors, old boats and rickety docks, open doors, that new summer smell.
There weren't a lot of people out so it made everything I usually notice twice as intriguing without the loud noises of the honking boats and distractions of the lake.
This is why I love our house. The lake and the view and people who make it a memory.
Everything is so green and fresh :) I couldn't imagine anywhere I'd rather be.

and i'm no longer a freshman...

I cannot believe the year went by as quickly as it did. It's even weirder that for some reason everyone I talked to who has gone through their freshmen year has warned me of just this, but of course I always thought things would be different my time around.
It is so weird for me to think about my first night in redlands, knowing no one besides my fellow high-schoolers whose destination was the same as mine, with two new roommates I met 6 hours ago, and a campus I did not understand at all. I pretty much just wanted to laugh because I knew I was in for quite the ride, but at the same time terrified of where everything would lead me.
One thing I'm happy about.. keeping this up! Even if sometimes I didn't 'feel like it' or thought I was too tired to write I somehow got myself to post consistent entries and now have a whole years worth of thoughts, feelings, and memories that I know I will never forget.

From classes to boys to going greek to girlfriends to beer to late night papers to pledging to sunshine to unexpected amazing nights I WOULDN'T CHANGE ANYTHING FOR THE WORLD.

I learned so much from
the people I met,
the parties that sucked,
the community showers that required shoes,
and the boys who made it fun..

I am starting to see why people call it the best four years of their life.

I mean, who wouldn't like someone paying for "school" aka 24 hr social calendar, no curfew or job necessary. yeah, that sounds pretty good to me.
NOTE: However I am most likely getting a job at the redlands YMCA next fall semester :) so don't write me off as a complete slacker.

quotes that ive grown to love over this past year----

"there comes a point in your life when you realize who matters, who never did, who won't anymore, and who always will. so don't worry about people from your past, there's a reason they didn't make it to your future."

"imperfection is boring, madness is genius, and it is better to be absolutely ridiculous then absolutely boring." m. monroe

"with friendship it doesn't matter how long you've known each other or how many fights you got into. what matters is who said 'i'll be here for you' and proved it"

"i'm the type of girl who will burst out laughing in dead silence at something that happened yesterday."

"what's meant to be... will always find its way ♥"